mayhem.

i just came home a bit ago to discover 2 strange men building a fence in the backyard (the new tenants as of June), 2 roommates, a sister and cousin of one roommate, the fiancee of the other, and random furniture EVERYWHERE. all under the same roof.
so. many. people. and their stuff.
hence, i've locked myself in my room. i'm such an introvert.
there is just so much going on right now. so many emotions and changes and...everything. friend leaving for Germany this week. moving out in less than a week -the end of 2 full years of living in this house with some pretty amazing people- and going our separate ways. friend coming from Germany on Sunday eve. leaving YWAM and trying to finish well. heading back to NS in a month and a bit, thus leaving Vancouver and its quite lovable people behind. not being sure of what lies after the summer of milking those cows twice a day.
so. much.
and, i don't know how to handle it all. i just feel like locking myself in my room. oh, wait...i did that already. but really. how do i do this?
sigh. so much, but i don't think it's too much...
somewhere, in the midst of this mayhem, i find peace. the peace that passes all understanding (down in my heart. where? down in my heart.).
and it's ok.
it will be ok.

i love...

...lilacs on my kitchen table. hoods. scarves. pockets...in everything. deep conversations with good friends. laughing. discovering who i am supposed to be. "golden hour." biking home from work. cooking dinner for those i love. finding the perfect gift for a friend. making cards. being creative when i didn't know i had it in me. reading a compelling book. singing. what i do every day. watching "The Office" with my housemates. talking on skype with faraway friends. sleeping. when God reveals something new to me. roadtrips. weddings. summer. taking good pictures. writing things down. life. babies. joy. hope. grace. a good cry. coffee in the morning. finding friends in strangers. hearing the stories of others. numbers and sudokus. stupid jokes. hearing a song that fits the moment.

right now...

the Bokmas in BC

as many of you know, British Columbia was graced with the visiting presence of George (aka Dad), Luanne (aka Mom), and Sara (aka sister friend) Bokma in the month of April. oh yes, good times were had.
the threesome arrived by plane on a sunny, yet chilly Good Friday (aka the 28th wedding anniversary of my parents) and the week flew by until Bad Friday, when they left by the same means of transportation. it was sad. but, let's focus on the days in between!
during those 7 days, we managed to paint Vancouver red (not really, it's just a saying...), as well as head to Vancouver Island to explore its many sights (Victoria, Chemainus, Nanaimo, Parksville, Quallicum Beach (and falls!), Coombs, Cathedral Grove, and Port Alberni, to name a few!) it was wonderful to share a bit of my life with them and to make some lasting memories with these loved-ones, if only for a few days.
let's look at some pictures to give you a better picture (:D) of it all!

the good ol' Commercial Drive, where the magic happens...

they are eating with chopsticks! it's a good day, even though Mom swiftly moved to the fork after the photo was taken...

fun times at Lynn Canyon, my tourist hot spot staple!

one of my favorite memories of our time together. it was a clear Sunday night after a typical rainy Vancouver day. in the afternoon, we had gone to our home to nap, and woke up and went to Stanley Park to find this beautiful scene.

4/9ths of the Bokma family in front of the parliment buildings in Victoria. too bad they were closed for tours!

sister time!

cherry blossoms! i'm going to miss these first signs of spring next year...

ferry ride back to Vancouver from Nanaimo (we totally bought Nanaimo bars in Nanaimo and ate them on the ferry!). what a beautiful day!

Mom and i. aren't we cute?

Shannon Falls in Squamish. Sara and i were tired of driving, getting out, and driving again, so we stayed in the car until Dad came running, exclaiming the beauty of this place. he was right. it was positively spectacular!

*if these aren't enough pictures for your viewing pleasure, please make your way to either NS or BC where one of the 3 ladies will be happy to share countless (i'm guessing hundreds) other memories capture on film and in our hearts. thank you, and have a great day!

becoming.

as always, where to begin?
it's been one of "those" days. just lazing around the house, puttering about, talking with friends, but not getting much done. and this is difficult for someone who gauges the success of her day by what she finishes. i know, it's only 4PM, but the day is steadily slipping away from me. and once again, my fear of being out of control is controlling me. sigh...
it's on days like these that hopelessness and insecurity reign. my idle mind wanders, and i find myself lost. ravaged by emotions and doubts, i crumble in a heap. who am i? where am i going? why is it so hard?
yet, in this seeming hopelessness, i also find myself found. Someone is pursuing me and watering the seeds He has planted. He is growing me, i am becoming, and there IS hope.
i am His, and He is mine. delightful.